Dolphin Man

By Taniya A., 4th Grade, Chalmers School
That's Weird, Grandma

Once there was a man name Dolphin man he lived under the water with the Dolphins. He loved to play like he’s a Dolphin. He ate with the Dolphins.
One day when the family of Dolphins and the Dolphin man was playing who can do the best flips. Some people were on the trip of hunting Dolphins. Dolphin man tried to save one of the Dolphins but it was too late they had already stuck the jagged edge of the arrow and his Dolphin mother.  The Dolphins cried all day all night.  I felt so sorry for them. So they moved to the Antarctic Ocean.
They lived a real good life without their mommy.

Dance Contest

By Dijon W., Agassiz
That's Weird, Grandma

Once there was a Dance Contest in Russha then two old man was dancing and the Judge said it was a tie and the two old mans started to fight.  There wives stopped them from fighting and told them that it is just a dance contest and he said if I win we will be rich and then one of the old mans name was Richerd and the other old man name is Robberd then Richerd kicked Robberd in the head and and Robberd won and they got the money and the two wives went shopping with the money while the two old mans was fighting.  The end.

Crystal

By Sofia G., Pritzker School
That's Weird, Grandma

Once there was a girl named Crystal.  She loved to go swimming.  She lived by the beach.  She always wanted to go swimming in the water.  Everyone told her not to go in there she always wondered why they said not to go in there.  Then one day her mom had told her why.  Her mother said that one day a little girl named Amber went in the water and never came out.  They still say that she haunts the water and that’s why you shouldn’t go in there said her mother.  Then one day Crystal had decided to go in the water.  She swam and swam till sunset.  Then when Crystal swam down she found a body and took it to shore.  She noticed that it was a little girl.  Then she called her mom and she didn’t say anything.  Then all of a sudden Crystal remembered that a little girl named Amber swam and never came out.  Then when the mom had left the girl woke up and she started to talk and told Crystal to follow her.  They both went in the water and Amber took her real deep.  Then Crystal saw a city underwater.  Amber said that she had made it.  Then they went inside it and had lots of fun then Crystal had said would you like to live with me and Amber said she would like to but she would also want to stay in the water.  Amber and Crystal were good friends.  Crystal always went to go see her.

Be Careful What You Say!

By Ana J., Pritzker School
That's Weird, Grandma

There once was a magical horse.  His name was Goldy horse.  He would win 1st place for every race he was in.  One day a crazy man wanted to win so much that he thought if he ate olives for a hole month he’d win.  This man would wear his clothes backwards!  After a month of eating nothing but olives he lost.  The crazy man just got worse.  Now, one day when Goldy horse was getting ready to race the crazy man came into the den where the horse was.  The crazy man yelled, “What’s your secret!  I need to know it!”  The horse said, “Kindness”.  The man was shocked that the horse could speak.  No one really knows the crazy man’s name so we’re going to call him Psycho.  Psycho no longer wanted to race.  The horse would look at him and smile and for the rest of the day the man would be screaming.  Psycho remembered what Goldy horse told him, so he tried it and nothing happened.  As soon as he lost he yelled, “Dumb horse!  You didn’t help me with anything.”  Psycho started to cry!  The horse was there when he said it.  Psycho didn’t notice that he was there.  Goldy horse walked by him and said, “You have to be nice for a hole month.”  “Whatever.” said Psycho looking annoyed.  The horse was upset that Psycho was ignoring him so he started to call him names.  Goldy horse had lost the race that he was in that day.  His owner said, “If you don’t win the next race your in, I’m going to eat you for dinner!”  Goldy horse was scared.  He went over to Psycho and said sorry, but he didn’t mean it.  Goldy horse lost the next race he was in and indeed his owner had him for dinner that night.  Goldy horse had been haunting his owner for the rest of his life.  His owner started to go crazy!  He couldn’t take it anymore so he put an end to his life.  Goldy horse thought that was the funniest thing, but as soon as he started to laugh his spirit died and his mission of revenge was over at last.  As for Psycho, he had a wife and had 3 beautiful children.  I’m sure this is the end to Goldy horse, or is it?

A Toothless Beaver and a Broom

By Abigail H., Cleveland School
Dialogues That's Weird, Grandma

Setting: In a castle

A toothless beaver: aahhh you look all ugly with your blue hair.
A broom: You look like a dog.
A toothless beaver: oh yea wate be careful of that stick oh my god your hair is stuck
A broom: someone need to help me because I’m dead.

A Bad Day

By Kevin V., 3rd Grade, Cleveland School
True Stories That's Weird, Grandma

Yesterday I went to my dad’s soccer game but they lost the game.  They were in the finals but it had to end some time.  I was sad my dad was sad my dad’s team was sad, like I said, it had to end some time.

1996 (Rubber Band)

By Cristian V., 4th Grade, Columbia Explorers Academy
True Stories That's Weird, Grandma

I remember when I was a little boy I put a rubber band on my hand and when I went to sleep the rubber band started getting tight on my hand. So my dad woke up he was very worried so he look at my hand and saw the rubber band and he took it off and then my hand didn’t bother me no more.

10th Date

By Michelle W., Gwendolyn Brooks
That's Weird, Grandma Other Venues Wilmette 2008

Once there was a girl named Ashley and a Man named Frankie.  They’re on their 10th date.  Frankie breaks up with her.  She gets really mad and slaps him.  “Why!” she said.  Frankie said “I’m moving to Alaska.”  “I’m going to miss you!”  “Yeah!”  “Well, isn’t this when you say I’ll miss you too?”

Vault

By Elijah D., Chalmers School
That's Weird, Grandma

There was a man guarding a vault he didn’t let anyone in.  A man came and tried to get in and he killed the guard.  He tried to open the vault but he couldn’t.  So he got a bomb and put it by the vault.  The vault didn’t open so the man went home.  Everyone wanted to know what was in the vault.  It was full of gold!  The End.

Vaca and Mariposa en el Bosque (Cow and Butterfly in the Forest)

By Aylin C., Loyola Park After School Program
Dialogues Spanish That's Weird, Grandma

Vaca: Yo quiero ser mariposa.
Mari: Come puedes hacer mariposa?
Vaca: Con mucho practica!
Mari: Yo quiero ser una vaca!

English translation:

Vaca: I want to be a a butterfly.
Mari: How can you be a butterfly?
Vaca: With a lot of practice!
Mari: I want to be a cow!